ThunderBoldt

 

Men are suckers and women are liars. Those two sweeping generalizations will only apply to this situation…for now. Imagine this conversation, for most guys it’s more like remembering the last time this phrase was spoken on a date:

 

“Oh that’s cool, I love sports too!”

 

Therein lies the false statements which suck men in.

 

She is only ok with the idea of you liking sports not the actualities of college football marathons on Saturdays, NFL Sundays, Monday Night Football, and the local high school games on Friday.

 

While she may enjoy sporting activities and the occasional big game, the inundation of the 24/7 Sports Center world can be more than a thorn in the side of a relationship – it can be the final nail in the coffin.

 

There is an equation that will quell these fears and give sports fanatics an opportunity to have their cake and eat it too. It’s called the happy wife quotient represented by q+t=x*3. In other words, quality plus time equals activities that she likes to do times 3.

 

In order to maintain the relationship, and the one with her too – it’s all about putting in the work leading up to game day and must be done at a three to one ratio. College students are familiar with this idea, for every hour of class there should be three hours of studying. It sounds intimidating and unrealistic at times but when applied, tests become easier and more guilt free sports viewing is enjoyed.

 

This next word problem will help those who struggle with numbers.

 

Sunday is the Super Bowl and Jonny’s favorite team is playing. Jonny has a Jennie that likes to spend time with him and she is not into sports. Counting the pre-game and post-game Jonny plans to watch five hours of coverage. How many hours of quality time does he need to spend with her during the week to satisfy the happy wife quotient?

 

Answer: 15 hours.

 

This may sound like a lot and in reality it adds up to a moderate sized internship. But the beauty of sports is that the schedule is laid out in advance and will never leave you waiting in car in sub-zero temperatures to warm it up for them.

 

Jonny finds out two weeks before the game that his team will be playing for the championship and instantly realizes that like the team, he too has hard work to do before the big game. Knowing this he can visualize the hours spreading out over the next two weeks and falling on the calendar with two hours at Target on Tuesday, an hour apiece at TJ Max and Ross, and not to mention three hours meandering through the mall going from store to store on Thursday.

 

All of a sudden date night on Friday changes from Texas Road House and a round of mini golf to Chinese takeout and You’ve Got Mail again.

 

The intense feelings of pure joy when your team wins, is the closest thing to experiencing heaven on earth, next to her of course. The high this event produces and merely a shot at glory gives men the strength to window-shop, peruse the dollar section merchandise, and debate the pros and cons of a new hamper.

 

It must be true that anything worth doing is worth doing right. If that is a true principal then putting in the cross training of relationships and sports can be a synergized relationship saver.