Out of the frying pan and into the friend zone

“Let’s just be friends” is a phrase no one likes to hear. Especially not from someone who you wanted to be with romantically. Unfortunately, those four words are said way too much.

So you shared a kiss. Maybe even more. Perhaps you proclaimed your love for one another. But then it was decided, either mutually or one sided, to take a step back.

Now you’re caught in the dreaded friend zone. Maybe he wasn’t ready for a relationship. Maybe you weren’t ready for a relationship. Or maybe, simply, you just didn’t work as a couple. But you still wanted to be in each other’s lives, so you decided to go from lovers to just friends.

When they say love is a game, they aren’t kidding. Just when you get comfortable with someone and convince yourself you trust them enough to give them your heart, they suddenly fold. They leave you with no choice but to do the same. It hurts the most when you were about to go all in and invest your everything.

Perhaps the underlying reason was that they were just too scared you would break each other beyond repair. Maybe it was because they had previous experience with getting their heart broken, and refused to repeat the past. Or maybe, they were just scared, petrified with irrational fear.

That is not a valid reason to say goodbye to someone you love. Maybe that is why the option of friendship seems so appealing. Less effort, less complication, and less chance of your heart getting obliterated. Or so you think.

Junior Kristin Walker said, “Once you kiss, there is sexual tension. Either from the guy or girl. So I don’t think you can just go back to being friends once you’ve kissed.”

It sounds like she is speaking from experience. Experience many girls can relate to. The scenario of boy meets girl, boy falls for girl, girl isn’t sure she wants him, boy gets scared of getting hurt, boy ends things before girl can hurt him back. It is a classic plot that should not surprise, but it gets you every time.

Kristen later remarked “however, there are exceptions to every rule.” The rule should not be such a brutal standard, but apparently it is.

Whenever you get scared the rule seems to constitute playing the “just friends” card, which then allows you to get out of jail free. Until the part where the other person decides to simply stop playing your games, and leaves you in the dust. Then the friend zone seems like a cold blooded killer, not a sweet escape. Sophomore Brayden Linde said

“I can be friends with girls I’ve kissed. But not if they dumped me. If I dumped them, then it would be okay.”

So perhaps the friend zone isn’t a safe haven after all. Perhaps it is the ultimate war zone, even more dangerous than the game of love. But that doesn’t mean it isn’t worth a try. •