Top Ten TV icons that deserve to die and why

10. Tom Selleck – tiny shorts, disgusting hairy bodies and mustaches will never make a comeback

9. Simon Cowell – every season of his show is exactly the same

8. Calista Flockhart – no anorexic has ever lived this long

7. Bob Barker – controlling the pet population is playing God

6. Dennis Franz – we will never ever forget seeing his butt on primetime TV

5. Joan Rivers – she looks dead; therefore, she should be dead

4. Charlie Brown – animated manic-depressive

3. All six Friends– with all the sleeping around they did, they’d all have died from AIDS by now

2. Oprah Winfrey – she makes too many people cry

1. Dr. Phil – Jesus Christ to poor people and yuppie